All is well.

"And now, verily, verily, I say unto thee, put your trust in that Spirit which leadeth to do good—yea, to do justly, to walk humbly, to judge righteously; and this is my Spirit. Verily, verily, I say unto you, I will impart unto you of my Spirit, which shall enlighten your mind, which shall fill your soul with joy;"

-D&C 11:12-13

This scripture has been on my mind these past couple of days. Well, weeks, really. I just love feeling like Heavenly Father is still guiding my life. You maybe know of my host of irrational fears, and one of them recently was that after my mission, I would never feel a prompting as strong as the one I got to go on a mission. I am very happy to have that irrational fear calmed and feel like my life is still in the Lord's hands. I used to have a really hard time with this; I felt like the Lord's plan for my life was going to happen no matter what and that I had no say in it. As if I wanted to resist and plan out my life all by myself (This is where He laughs to himself and says, "Oh you little child. Nice try."). My change of heart with regards to this was summed up very nicely today in sacrament meeting when the speaker talked about how our desire ought not be ours alone and how we need to align our will to the Father's.

So true. Because, really, He knows all. He knows exactly what experiences I need to grow and become better (He really has his work cut out with that one) and be happy. He has a plan for my life, and what a comfort that is!! Of course, I still do my part to live my life and plan and work toward things and try to be and do my best, but then I try to seek His will and His guidance for my life. And sometimes it works. And it's a wonderful feeling. I'm so happy with my life right now and I feel so happy about the future and I know that things are going to work out. Je suis bénie! A few months ago I had an experience with asking the Lord if everything was going to be okay. And He just said, "tout est bien" (yes, the answer came in French like that)--"all is well." How comforting to know that He's taking care of things, AKA my life.

Going along with this, I was just rereading this talk by President Uchtdorf from last conference and I was surprised, in reading about his experiences in a little town in Texas for pilot training, to find this passage:

"At the time, Big Spring, despite its name, was a small, insignificant, and unknown place. And I often felt exactly the same way about myself—insignificant, unknown, and quite alone. Even so, I never once wondered if the Lord had forgotten me or if He would ever be able to find me there. I knew that it didn’t matter to Heavenly Father where I was, where I ranked with others in my pilot training class, or what my calling in the Church was. What mattered to Him was that I was doing the best I could, that my heart was inclined toward Him, and that I was willing to help those around me.
I knew if I did the best I could, all would be well.
And all was well."
{The footnote here says that Pres. Uchtdorf graduated first in his class.}

The talk continues . . .

"Please understand that what you see and experience now is not what forever will be. You will not feel loneliness, sorrow, pain, or discouragement forever. We have the faithful promise of God that He will neither forget nor forsake those who incline their hearts to Him. Have hope and faith in that promise. Learn to love your Heavenly Father and become His disciple in word and in deed.
Be assured that if you but hold on, believe in Him, and remain faithful in keeping the commandments, one day you will experience for yourselves the promises revealed to the Apostle Paul: “Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him."
(You Matter to Him, Dieter F. Uchtdorf)

This part really struck a chord with me too. About a month ago, I literally wrote myself a note in French that said, "Today, I really need to remind myself of the fact that I will not always be single (*fingers crossed*), a student, poor, a roommate, a Provo city resident, friendless (at least, friends that are also single)." And then President Uchtdorf just goes and says, don't worry, you won't be. It's just your life right now. And another one of his quotes echoes in my mind: "No matter how bleak the chapter of our lives may look today, because of the life and sacrifice of Jesus Christ, we may hope and be assured that the ending of the book of our lives will exceed our grandest expectations." It's just beyond reassuring.

Another speaker from last conference, Elder Cornish, told a story about how while riding his bike home after a long day of work, he prayed that he would find a quarter so that he could buy a chicken drumstick (substitute chocolate in there for chicken drumstick and you get my every day). He desperately wanted that chicken to give him the extra push he needed to get home, but he only had a nickel. He says, "As I rode along, I told the Lord my situation and asked if, in His mercy, He could let me find a quarter on the side of the road. I told Him that I didn't need this as a sign but that I would be really grateful if He felt to grant me this kind blessing." Well, lo and behold, as he started watching the road attentively, "trying to maintain a faith-filled but submissive attitude," he saw a quarter on the ground. He bought the chicken, ate it happily, and was filled with relief and gratitude. And fried chicken. Haven't we all been there? "I don't need this as a sign, Lord, but I would be really grateful for this little blessing. Please?" I remember one especially trying day on my mission. My companion and I had walked ALL over our area with very little to show from it. At the end of the day we were headed over to the church for a branch activity that we'd invited some investigators to. We tried not to complain, but, she later told me, all my companion secretly wanted was some cookies and all I secretly wanted was some letchy (letchy season is teasingly torturous in the islands because it's growing everywhere but you can't just ask for some . . . we often joked about only knocking doors that had letchy trees for a while, just to increase our chances of being offered some. I don't remember if we ever really did). So as we were cutting through the gas station to go to the chapel, one of our best investigators, Pako, pulled up at the same time. He had another guy in his car (some kid that he'd hired to work in his yard or something?) and while we were talking to Pako in the parking lot, he sent the guy inside. Do you know what he came out with?
Cookies. For us. The pink Valentine's day-themed Arnott's cookies that are so good. The exact kind of cookies that my companion had been wanting. Coincidence? I think not. So, that made us happy. We thanked Pako profusely and continued on our way to the chapel.

We arrived much earlier than we'd expected, so I suggested that we go up the street to try to contact this old investigator that we'd been trying to get in touch with. We agreed to try this one last house to end off our fruitless day (hahaha... wait for it...). Well, we got to the house and started knocking on the white metal gate. Like many of the houses along that street, I noticed that the lawn was being nicely shaded by several tall letchy trees, covered with the little red fruit. I think the lady who we were trying to contact was named Susanna. Something like that. Anyway, she wasn't home. But her mother was. And yes, she would tell Susanna that we'd stopped by, and no, she wasn't interested in hearing our message. And by the way, would we like some letchy?

As I looked upward while she used the long fruit-picking pole to gather several bunches of letchy for us, I said a little prayer of gratitude for such a wonderful, loving Heavenly Father who blesses us so much more than we know, and so much more than we deserve. We would have been fine that day without the cookies and the letchies, but it just made us so grateful and so aware that the Lord was watching over us and taking care of our needs, as small as they were.
Elder Cornish finishes his story by saying,

"In His mercy, the God of heaven, the Creator and Ruler of all things everywhere, had heard a prayer about a very minor thing. One might well ask why He would concern Himself with something so small. I am led to believe that our Heavenly Father loves us so much that the things that are important to us become important to Him, just because He loves us. How much more would He want to help us with the big things that we ask, which are right (see 3 Nephi 18:20)?" (The Privilege of Prayer, J. Devn Cornish)

So basically, the moral of this post is just to say trust. Trust in the Lord. He is so kind and loving and wonderful and we are His children. Which means that He wants us to be happy more than anything, and He will never let us down and never let us lose our way. He never gives us more than we can handle (even though we may think so). He blesses us for our obedience and our faith in Him and in His Son. And to boot, he gives us those extra little blessings along the way just to help keep us sane. Look for those blessings, trust in the Lord, and all will be well.



Here are just a few of my "trust in the Lord, He will guide you" reminders:

"Yea, we can see that the Lord in His great infinite goodness doth bless and prosper those who put their trust in Him." -Helaman 12:1

"Though he slay me, yet will I trust in Him." -Job 13:15

"Whoso trusteth in the Lord, happy is he." -Proverbs 16:20

". . . we should put our trust in Him, and He will deliver us." -Alma 61:13

"Therefore, lift up your heads, and rejoice, and put your trust in God, in that God who was the God of Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob." -Mosiah 7:19

"Be of good cheer, for I will lead you along." -D&C 78:18

"Be thou humble; and the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand, and give thee answers to thy prayers." -D&C 112:10

Consider the sheep of His fold,

How they follow where He leads.

Though the path may wind across the mountains,

He knows the meadows where they feed.

He clothes the lilies of the field.

He feeds the birds in the sky,

And He will feed those who trust Him,
And guide them with His eye.

-Consider the Lilies

Be still, my soul: Thy God doth undertake

To guide the future as he has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;

All now mysterious shall be bright at last.

Be still, my soul: The waves and winds still know

His voice who ruled them while he dwelt below.

-Be Still, My Soul

And of course, I can't forget my classic "trust in the Lord" song:


Lead, kindly Light, amid th'encircling gloom; Lead thou me on!
The night is dark, and I am far from home; Lead thou me on!
Keep thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene--one step enough for me.

I was not ever thus, not pray'd that thou shouldst lead me on.

I loved to choose and see my path; but now, Lead me on!
I loved the garish day, and, spite of fears,
Pride ruled my will. Remember not past years.

So long thy pow'r hath blest me, sure it still will lead me on
O'er moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent, till the night is gone.
And with the morn those angel faces smile,
Which I have loved long since, and lost a while!
-Lead, kindly Light