It was a Monday night where I first had a horrible pain in my back. I didn't know what was going on or why--all I knew was that it was killing me. Now I am new to this whole physical pain thing. I've been pretty lucky in my life to never have had any serious medical conditions or accidents or anything. Probably a good thing since I'm obviously kind of a wimp. After I took a hot bath and the pain level didn't change at all, I writhed on my bed and reconciled myself to my impending death. To my surprise, I kept my consciousness and all of a sudden, the pain just stopped. I thought that was weird. Then I went to bed.
Next morning, I was driving to my stores that were 2 hours away. An hour and a half into my drive, the pain comes back. I sped to the nearest exit, fearing I would pass out from the pain tearing into my back. Parked in front of a gas station, more writhing ensued. Once I got a handle on the pain, my first thought was to call my little sister. I reached for my phone and felt a very distinct, "call Lisa." So I instead called my older sister, Lisa, and proceeded to sob on the phone to her. She did her best to calm me down and coach me into the "neutral back" position (lying in the backseat of my car)--but that didn't help the pain. She started asking me about what I'd been eating, which I thought was weird, but then she said that she recognized my symptoms because she'd had them before. Gallstones. Kill me. So after crying on the phone with her for a good half an hour and trying to find out which of my coworkers was nearest to me so they could come pick me up, the pain again stopped.
I eventually ended up at the ER (after going to three different clinics and crying at each one as i explained what had happened) just outside of Greensboro, North Carolina. Random, much? Yeah. They did an ultrasound, blood tests (yes, I passed out also when they drew my blood.)--the whole nine yards. Hours and hours later, the doctor came in to tell me the prognosis: one little gallstone. Luckily, there was no need for an immediate surgery or anything, so I picked myself up and drove the hour and a half back to my hotel. It took me a while to dare to eat real food again (though in addition to my self-imposed no-sugar diet, I am now also dairy-free [which I did for about 8 months anyway, so I'm used to that] and low-fat--in an attempt to keep my gallbladder from having to work too hard and attack me again), but I haven't had any problems since. Phew!
As funny as it may seem, this whole experience was actually a blessing. I was praying hard in the days preceding the attack for help in eating better. And although this was quite an extreme answer, it is definitely forcing me to be more conscientious of what I eat. The threat of excruciating pain can do wonders for self-control.
The other thing about this experience that I learned was again, just how aware Father in Heaven is of me and my situation--though at times it seems as though He picks and chooses what prayers to answer... I digress. I am positive that it was the Spirit who prompted me to call my older sister--probably the only person I know who could've recognized my symptoms for what they were (people with gallstones don't always have pain in their back--it's more often in the abdomen, but Lisa's pain was in the exact same spot as mine).
This experience also strengthened my testimony of the Priesthood. My friend called his friend who lives in NC, who called her brother, who called his home teaching companion to come over to my hotel room with him and give me a blessing. Talk about the Priesthood in action! It was my first experience with a complete stranger giving me a blessing, and it just made it all the more evident that the words spoken were coming straight from the Lord.
Finally, this whole gallstone debacle taught me an important lesson about the Atonement. I have read Alma 7 I don't know how many times in my life, but I have never understood the magnitude of those few verses in the middle:
11. And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.
12. And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities.
13 Now the Spirit knoweth all things; nevertheless the Son of God suffereth according to the flesh that he might take upon him the sins of his people, that he might blot out their transgressions according to the power of his deliverance; and now behold, this is the testimony which is in me.
Just think about that. Often we think of the Atonement in two parts: overcoming 1) physical death, meaning we will be resurrected, and 2) spiritual death, meaning we can be forgiven of our sins. But It really isn't as cut and dry as that, and it's unbelievable to think that those two things were all that were required of our Savior, but He went above and beyond what was merely required to redeem us. He decided to forego learning about all our other trials through the Spirit and chose instead to experience all the pains of mortal life Himself. Not to save us. Not to redeem us. Not for any practical use as far as the Atonement goes. He did it so that His bowels would be filled with mercy. So that He could empathize with us in every painful situation. I just can't get over that. I can't get over the love He has for us and His willingness to suffer every affliction, every pain, so that, in my own moments of pain and affliction, I know that I can turn to Him and find the support and comfort I need. This demi-god truly descended beneath all, experiencing the full gamut of the mortal experience so that He could know according to the flesh how to succor us. He can succor us--come to our aid--not because He is God, but because He was man. What an extraordinary love. What an incomprehensible sacrifice on His part. I am so happy to know who my Savior is.
So all in all, I'm just totally grateful for that horrible pain I felt, if only for the lessons it taught me and the opportunity it allowed me to utilize the Atonement in a way I never have before. (That's not to say I want to go through it again, but still!)
